Being your own mother

Being your own mother. Fostering strength and wellbeing for yourself, just as you would for your kids.

photo credit - Womb Healing - The Photo Forest

photo credit - Womb Healing - The Photo Forest

“The key to unconditional love is found in the love our spirit has for our personality. When we can tap into spirit, we can unconditionally love ourselves – including the parts of us that are angry, judgmental, needy, and selfish. Then we naturally feel compassion and acceptance toward others as well.”  Quote from Shakti Gawain ‘The Path Of Transformation’

Be careful how you talk to yourself, because you are listening.

Take a moment to check within. How do you talk to yourself. What is the internal dialogue going on for you at any given time. In particular, when you are under pressure, stressed, tired or angry. Are you kind to yourself, or are you judgmental and self critical?  

One of my biggest life challenges has been to learn to speak my truth in all situations. For many years, low self esteem contributed to me holding back my ideas, censoring myself, suppressing my voice, and being really unhappy. I was trapped by my belief of not being good enough, and my inner dialogue was critical. I made choices that didn’t turn out well, often aimed at pleasing others, and reinforced my belief that I wasn’t good enough. My inner dialogue was always ready to reinforce this belief. 

I finally reach a turning point in life, where I realised that I couldn’t keep living this way, as it was painful. Reaching out for help, I began the journey of self-discovery, and learning to love myself. I met my inner healer and inner mother. I learned about compassion. Many things in my life began to change, as I made choices that were aligned with my values and the vision I held for myself.

My self-mothering allowed me to meet all the aspects of myself, including those I didn’t like. I gave space for my feelings to be expressed and accepted. For healing to take place. I learned how to look after my whole self, just as a mother would care for her child.

I changed my life through learning to be compassionate and kind to myself. It’s a bumpy road, a work in progress and often challenging, however it is true to who I am. It means I live with integrity, and have clear boundaries saying ‘no’ to what is not right for me, and ‘yes’ to what is. And it’s so worth it.

Armed with this understanding of how to care for myself, I am able to offer space for others to learn to do the same. I am able to witness people’s stories, and help them to find their own healing path towards self love and being true to themselves. It means I see the whole person in every person, even when that person can’t see there own worth, and I can stand by them as they find their own way home. 

On this inner path of self love and acceptance, separation changes to connection. What flourishes within, begins to grow beyond the individual, to our families and our communities.  Each person finding their own key to unconditional love, is able to send the ripples of change to the world around them. For a parent raising a young family, the gift of self love is a priceless legacy.