Pleasure
Author – Katia Krassas © Copyright -
Please do not copy without written permission from the author.
“Pleasure”
This was the message I received on my recent Soul Quest.
Soul Quest is a process of retreating solo into nature, as a sacred process for soul-directed answers to some of life’s big questions. A way to navigate life from that place of inner knowing that’s not clouded by external influence. It is nature-based, involving a solo retreat into wild nature, staying within a circle for a whole day, commencing before first light at dawn and staying put until dark has fallen.
When I recently underwent Soul Quest, up in the mountains west of Coffs Harbour, I was seeking answers to themes relating to the work I am birthing into the world. It wasn’t easy. This type of process has its challenges. I encountered so much resistance, annoyance and discomfort. My tummy gave me hell as my body decided to literally let go on a physical level. A reflection of the letting go and expanding on an emotional and spiritual level. This internal clean up and preparation gives space for the new to grow.
When I was ready to surrender into internal silence, my question released into the ether, I received an unexpected response to my question: ‘To bring my attention to pleasure’.
This seemed like such a random answer. If it had come to me during my daily life, I would’ve discounted it. During Soul Quest I realised this was important, even if I didn’t yet know how or why. So I decided to explore the idea of pleasure and my relationship to it.
The sensory pleasure of the sun and the breeze on my skin was a beautiful. As I expanded into this exploration, I noticed that there was something else happening within my body. There were feelings that didn’t feel very pleasurable at all. Investigating them, expressing them, I encountered shame. Shame for my body, leading me to beliefs that my ageing body isn’t worthy of pleasure, that a woman who is ageing is not beautiful, that she loses her value in a patriarchal society. There aren’t many body-positive images of older women in the media.
I allowed myself to fully feel what I have internalised. To feel the shame, the grief, the sense of loss. The anger at a society where women’s bodies are commodities. The grief and loss of my youth. The internalised shame that accompanies womens’ beliefs about themselves, the underlying belief of ‘not being enough’. I felt it all and expressed it all, to the sky and the earth and the trees. It was raw and confronting. It was a relief to meet the full force of this.
Eventually I came back to pleasure and the gentle loving sensory exploration of my skin, fully exposed to the sun , the earth and the breeze.
I lay on the earth and felt the warmth beneath me. I breathed in the smell of the earth, the grass. I tuned my whole body into becoming a receiver of sounds moving around me, of bird calls, of rustling leaves in trees. It was soothing and reassuring.
Nature has a different reality to that which we learn through socialisation. In nature, a tree is what it is. It doesn’t disguise itself to be acceptable to other trees. It grows and morphs. It becomes. And there is magic in the becoming.
I allowed the release, the letting go, the healing and welcomed the wisdom that my soul wanted me to know on this special day.
Pleasure.
I’ll be exploring this theme some more, as I see how it has a place in my offerings.
Katia Krassas
See my bio here: natureconnectionempowerment
If you’re looking for support and are interested in how I can help, please reach out.
At midlife, I embarked on a healing journey that involved overcoming trauma, letting go of people-pleasing, and finding my voice. I changed my career to become a Holistic Counsellor, Healer, and Nature Connection Facilitator. Now, I help women connect to their inner power and feel comfortable in their own skin.