Overcoming Chronic Stress to Stay Motivated for Exercise: A Guide for Women in Midlife

Maintaining motivation to achieve our goals, especially when it comes to regular exercise, can be challenging. On the surface, it might seem straightforward—just “do it,” as the familiar Nike slogan encourages. Originally intended to inspire people to overcome self-doubt and pursue their physical activity goals, it has become a popular mantra in everyday life.

While this phrase can be helpful in some situations, I’m not convinced it works for everyone. The tone in which it's delivered can change its meaning—it can sound pushy and impatient or supportive, like “just do it as one small step you can build on.” It could also imply, “You’ve come this far, you’re ready, it’s time to do it.”

Taking focused action is important for establishing a regular exercise routine. If you’ve done the groundwork and preparation but still hesitate to take the next step, an encouraging “just do it” might be all you need. However, for some, the reasons for flagging motivation are hidden beneath the surface. Pushing through might work temporarily, but without addressing these underlying issues, you may find yourself back at square one.

Some reasons for flagging motivation

Let’s keep things simple and not get caught up with overthinking it. However, if you’ve tried and keep finding yourself back to square one, it may be time to look a bit further.

A process of inquiry can be valuable in uncovering hidden reasons, allowing you to address them before creating a plan that meets your specific needs. This could involve undergoing an evaluation of mental health and physical health in case there’s something that needs your attention and is preventing you from getting moving. There are a few things your practitioner might explore with you. One example could be low iron levels leading to low energy. Another could be chronic stress that may be creating low moods and the feeling like your goals are out of reach, affecting both your mental health and motivation for physical activity.

Perimenopause

If you’re in perimenopause, it’s worth considering the effect it may be having on your life. The changes in hormones cause a whole host of symptoms, some of which could impact the motivation for movement and regular exercise. I had some fun making up names for some of the symptoms. I’m calling them peri-tiredness, peri-brain-fog, and peri-anxiety.

The discussion around peri-menopause and its impact on women’s lives is only now getting the airtime it deserves. It’s well worth doing a bit of research on this, as it may reveal some insights for you and your wellbeing, particularly in maintaining mental health and motivation for physical activity.

Some of the symptoms to be on the look out for in the context of this article are: exhaustion, hot flushes, trouble concentrating, mood changes and weight gain.

I won’t be going into more detail here about this topic but do want to emphasize its importance in women’s lives and to consider how it might be showing up for you in the context of this article.

A personal story

I recall a time in my life when I wanted to exercise regularly but struggled to maintain the motivation. Early in life, I was motivated by activities I enjoyed, like cycling to work and walking in nature. These activities seamlessly fit into my routine, making it easy to stay active and maintain reasonable mental health through consistent physical activity.

However, as life changed with taking on more responsibilities at work and home, I found myself needing a car for long commutes. The bike got forgotten, and my beautiful nature walks became a distant memory. Stress increased, and my once active lifestyle dwindled into inactivity. Despite my best intentions—like planning to wake up early for walks or joining a gym—I couldn’t sustain these efforts. Each attempt fell through for one reason or another, leaving me feeling defeated and exhausted. I knew I needed regular exercise to help with my energy and stress, which would also benefit my mental health. Unfortunately, I was in a rut and couldn’t make my way out of it.

The recurring theme was losing my motivation. My mind was willing, but my body wasn’t cooperating. On the surface, it might look like I gave up easily, but digging deeper revealed the hidden reasons behind my lack of motivation.

In my case, I needed variety, fun, buddies, instruction, and accountability to stay motivated. It took a while for me to finally crack my personal code; these elements were crucial in keeping me going. They continue to be.

Before I could move forward, I needed to understand what was holding me back. I was stuck in a cycle of chronic stress, which left me in a state of “freeze.” When the body’s stress response is activated, it’s designed for quick action in a crisis. The survival brain flips on, putting the body in a high-alert state—heart rate and breathing increase, blood is redirected to the limbs, and the digestive system slows down. This constant state of high alert can take a toll on both physical activity levels and mental health.

Is your nervous system in chronic fight or flight?

This is known as fight or flight, freeze, or fawn. The freeze state could look something like sitting quietly on the couch, scrolling endlessly on the phone. You might not look or feel stressed, but if you can’t stop scrolling, can’t get off that couch, if you’re irritable and eating for comfort, could your nervous system be in freeze?

Stress is normal. Chronic stress, however, isn't helpful, and its long-term effects on the body and brain can be damaging. This is especially true when it hinders regular exercise and negatively impacts mental health.  

This was my reality. I was overwhelmed, pushing myself to keep going, worried about family, my job, and feeling unsupported. To top it off, I was going through perimenopause, which added hormonal chaos to the mix, elevating my anxiety and brain fog. 

On a deeper level, my self-talk was unsupportive. My inner critic was loud and relentless, shaming me and eroding my self-worth. These were dark days as I was feeling like I would never change my ways.

Breaking out of the cycle

So, how did I break out of this cycle? The key ingredients were love, kindness, and a sense of safety. My body needed to feel safe in order to calm my nervous system. By disarming the inner critic with compassion and care, I began to create a new relationship with myself.

I sought help—what worked for me was a combination of counselling, kinesiology, and reiki—and slowly started to dismantle the stress response, uncovering unresolved emotions that had been buried for years. As I let go of this emotional clutter and changed my mindset of old beliefs, I gradually found my motivation again for both regular exercise and maintaining my mental health.

This journey has been life-changing. Today, I have a regular, rewarding exercise routine, which also helps me to maintain my overall health and mood. 

I’ve also transformed other aspects of my life, learning to follow my heart’s desires from a place of self-love rather than striving to be an idealized future version of myself. I find ways to incorporate pleasure and physical activity into my everyday life, nurturing a relationship with my body that prioritizes safety and kindness.

I’ve learned to take action toward my goals in emotionally safe and manageable steps. When my motivation falls away and my inner critic shows up, I can still become entangled with the negative thoughts. I now know that those thoughts are an old warning system and that it’s a sign that I need to slow down, create safety in my body, and investigate what is going on. Something inside of me is needing my attention and care, and it's time to go for a walk and look a bit deeper when those initial self-defeating thoughts come up.

This is why simply pushing through won’t necessarily create sustained motivation for a training routine. If the underlying issues remain unresolved, the body will default to old patterns. What appears as a lack of motivation might actually be an interplay of deeper, unresolved layers affecting both physical activity and mental health. Without addressing these, motivation will continue to ebb and flow, keeping the inner critic engaged and the nervous system on high alert.

Every person’s story is unique. The key is finding safety within your body and treating yourself with kindness and care.

In my work with women, I help them explore the patterns that may be limiting their potential. It’s powerful to have someone on your team, holding space for you as you cultivate a new relationship with yourself, and become your own best friend as you move toward your goals.

Katia Krassas

If you’re looking for support and are interested in how I can help, please reach out.

At midlife, I embarked on a healing journey that involved overcoming trauma, letting go of people-pleasing, and finding my voice. I changed my career to become a Holistic Counsellor, Healer, and Nature Connection Facilitator. Now, I help women connect to their inner power and feel comfortable in their own skin.

See my bio here: natureconnectionempowerment

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